Trying to figure things out.........

So I am a little upset today. I am just having a really hard time accepting anything at this point. We have spent the last 7 years giving our money, time and energy to have one disappointment after another. We paid our savings for heartache. So now we are not only left with more confusion and heartache but we are left with an empty savings account. I have said it many times in my life.... Money means nothing. In a way this has brought many things to my attention. It has shown me more than ever that money really means nothing. God means everything. The people in our lives are from God. Babies in our lives are from God. The only problem with that is, we have spent all our money and guess what?? We have to have more money to even have a chance of having more children. So now money means a lot. Money means more children. Guess where the money comes from... God. It all belongs to Him. Now this shows me that God is in control. God has plans for us that we are not able to understand or take over ourselves. As frustrating as it is, I know that money means nothing but is a huge burden on the equation of us having more children to love, for us to continue on with our lives the way we dream of. I know that God controls it all. The money, the infertility, the heartache and best of all, the blessings. Our hearts longing for more children is from God. Which again says that He has plans for us. With every year, it gets harder. With every day, it gets harder. With every tear drop, you guessed it... it gets harder. The problem is that we have had the same story for awhile now. We have been through every experience several times. Family and friends run out of things to say to us. No one knows how to show support because they have said or done it all already before. But guess what? It's harder now than it has ever been for us. So not only are we in more pain than ever, our family doesn't even know how to handle us. We don't even know how to handle us. We don't want to tell what is going on with us a lot of the time for that reason. Even so, we still need the support. We still need the help of the emotional roller coaster that is not over for us. Right now is really hard because not only are we completely confused and have everybody around us confused about how to deal with us, we are having to gather up money to buy what we hope is not more heartache. Money is low and so are our options. The money being low makes our options even lower. The glory in it all is that God has a plan for us and what ever it may be, He will make sure we have the means for the plan to go through. Even if it is a million dollars. We have an appointment on April 8th with our fertility doctor to talk about a few things. Our decision of our next step is solely based on one thing. I'll let everyone know what we decide soon but for now, we trust in God to help us make the right decision. One that doesn't lead us to even more heartache.