Still Here

Every month at a certain time of my cycle my ovaries feel a huge overload. They get completely full of cyst and it is painful for me. I expect it and I know exactly what days I will hurt, which is good considering I am regular in some way! My doctor told me that two major factors were effecting my success rates in every IVF cycle. 1. Being an emotional wreck. If you are not emotional stable and ready for a cycle, it has a major effect on what the cycle brings your way. 2. My weight. Now I know that I am very over weight and I also know why I am over weight. I have severe PCOS and I am on hormones that make you gain weight. She put me on a strict diet that is specially laid out for PCOS but it hasn't worked so well for me. I am insulin resistant. Which means my body prevents glucose from getting into cells, leading to high blood sugar and depriving your cells of the energy they need to function. My cells are literally starving for energy, even when plenty of glucose is available in the blood. My blood sugar is always really high but my body isn't getting the sugar which makes me feel like I am having extremely low blood sugar. I have high blood levels of insulin. I am on glucophage to help my blood sugar stay low instead of rising every time I eat. I am not able to cut all sugar but will start cutting more and more. Weight gain is a major issue when going through any fertility treatment. They say it can be the only reason for miscarriage or not conceiving at all. We know that we are on hold from our next IVF cycle and I really need to focus on my weight now. It is hard!! I want to eat everything! My blood work has been better and hopefully will continue to get better and better. We are still hoping the we will be able to start in January or February but it all depends. We could start any time we wanted before so this is a little frustrating. It almost feels like a HUGE set back before we ever start.......